(212): so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
(317): I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
(317): And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
(414): I just want to fool around, so if you get this and are down, pls respond
(669): I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Awesome fucking website www.textsfromlastnight.com, possibly better than fml? Seems a lot less fake...
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